Talking to you.

If making me feel loved secure and amazing was your aim. Then you failed. I wanna ring you tomorrow. I don't know the words to say to convey my disappointment, my hurt, my despair, my concern about whether you know how to do the right thing or not. I've been here so many times before and it turns out they always knew what to do to make me feel loved but they were too busy trying to make others feel loved so had none left over for me. I hope I'm wrong but no effort is no effort

You make the ordinary beautiful

I want you for all the things that that you make wonderful.
Waking up
Walks down the street
Moments at home
I want you to be my delicious secret

Hate you

I hate you so much.I really really can't stand you. I feel like you only want to smother me. Everyone else witholds love cos they don't get what they want from me. I know now but I still hate you. You try to insult me scare me into hiding my needs. Its not working what will you try next?

Man in the Mirror

It's not the same when I look at me. I don't see that same amazing, sexy woman that you see. I don't see anything. Can't I have you, please? I don't want to start over again with someone else. I don't want you,you are not right for me, but I miss everything you represent, an end to lonliness, a person to want me, someone else's take on what happened in my day.
Its cruel to me and to you, to be with you. Am I being cruel to myself by denying myself the pleasures of your company?
Life is so cruel and now I know why.I know the girls who do everything for their men only to find they don't reciprocate. To walk away hurting, trying to hurt them with their behaviour. But they never loved you any way and that's how player work. And that why brothers never let you put up with a guy mistreating you. Cos they know, they feel it too.
They feel it too.
But I'm still lonely and I still can't replicate the way I feel when you look at me that way.

I miss you

But I'm glad you are out of my life. I'm praying for the day I don't want you anymore.
That I don't miss you and when I don't long for the sound of your voice.

I wish I cared for you

This random blue swirl reminds me of you.Reminds me that Friday nights mean alot to me. But you never knew the right time to call or what to say or what to do. But that never really mattered anyway because I never really cared for you. I get it now. Why players play, why sayers say and why I need to hold on. I'm still holding on...

I wish this was my time

I see this flower and I see me. Nobody like me nobody I can connect to. I'm lost lost lost and I don't love anyone and I'm not loved in return. I don't want this I don't. I just don't.