I walk the world searching for beauty and poetry. Someone beautiful who will feed my hunger, give me pleasure so pure, so whole, so good that it takes away the isolation of my pain. I go from place to place trying to get my satisfaction. I don't even wish for a miracle.I just want a day without pain or triggers to remind me of my pain. I hope for days without pain on the menu. Sometimes I bury those feelings so deep I can't find them. The past troubles me as much as my present.
Wednesday, April 07, 2010
If I could stop
If I could stop needing then it wouldn't hurt when people disappoint me. How do I stop needing and will I lose a part of myself if I do? I can't lose myself anymore. ↲I just need an end to this neverending stream of pain. Nothing seems to lessen it. Everything makes it worse. I'm so so tired of feeling sorry for myself.
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